Havnt had sth which made mi drop tears for a long time. No matter how stressed I was, I dint drop a tear like I did in the past.
Left a wet patch wif black particles on my bed, a mixture of my tears n mascara. Confused, disillusioned, hurt, sad, blank. Maybe it was mi. Maybe it wasnt. Maybe it doesnt matter. Maybe it shdnt matter at all.
The whole saga may seem silly to some, but I do not c the need n haf no desire to deny dat THIS affects mi so.
Had dinner wif family. It was Daddy's bdae todae. Hadnt gotten a present. Hadnt the time to do so. Enjoyed the dinner. Had it at a place which brought bac mani memories. The place I used to frequent. Reminded mi of my grandma. How I wld walk wif her, hold her hand, watch her buy groceries, listen to her teach mi which fish was fresh n feel the love ani grandma wld gif her grandchild.
As mentioned, I haf been pretty emotional these few days. But itz for good reason. Juz feel itz time I pause to face things, to think, to feel wat has or has not been happening.
I am Missy Rissy.
I believe in living the world, n living your worth.
I want to be happy more than anything else.
I want to be who I am.
I am who I am.
